GET OFF MY BACK!!!!!!!

I know!!!!! I have been very lazy with this blogging stuff. I promise this will change starting soon. As a matter of fact I'll come up with my top ten music picks of 2006 starting on Monday. I need to come up with the list. Stay tuned!!!

SCREW YOU MISTER@!!!!@!!!!!!

This is for the Hummer that almost ran me over in the WAWA parking lot today and then parked diagonally in a spot.

F*** YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You think with your big car you can just muscle your way through life. Let's face it. You own a Hummer because you are an A**hole!!!

One day this is going to bite you in the ass. And I hope I'm there to see it when you trade in that thing for a CIVIC. Then I'll run you over with my INTREPID.

Good Day!!

WHOOPS

THE DEFINITION OF IRONIC


CAN COORS EXPECT "LIGHT" SENTENCE FOR DUI ARREST?

One could only guess what PETER COORS was drinking when he attended a friend's wedding reception six weeks ago. What is known is that the man whose beer company bears his name was busted May 29th for driving while under the influence. After leaving the wedding, a cop met up with Coors as the beer executive pulled his Jaguar into the driveway of his Golden, Colorado home. It seems that Coors ran a stop sign about a block away. Tests put Coors' blood/alcohol content at .088, just over the legal limit. He was cited for DUI and has been driving on a provisional license while he awaits arraignment scheduled for July 20th. In a statement released by the brewer, Coors apologized for his behavior and stressed that responsible use of alcohol remains his company's message. Coors, whose company became Molson Coors Brewing Co. last year, lost a close election for the U.S. Senate to Democrat KEN SALAZAR in 2004.

Am I Old? UMMMM..........

Dear God, I'm feeling old.

There I am in Sea Isle City on Saturday with the Rock n Roll patrol at Lacosta Lounge. We're at the outside deck area. Dr. bobby Fingers is playing. There isn't a song this guy doesn't know. Go see him when you get a chance.

So anyway I'm looking out and all I can see are drunk 21,22,23 year olds as far as the eye can see. Literally everywhere you turn somebody's drunk. And acting like a complete JACKASS!!

I watched a girl have a beer on the deck, walk to the pizza place(more like stumble) next door, have a slice, and then......throw up on the steps out front....AND NOT FROM THE PIZZA. She actually found it to be kind of amusing. Her boyfriend wiped off her face( he didn't do it for love....he did for the kinky action he'll be up to later because she's not gonna remember!!)..and she walked on her way. Off to the next beer.

I watched another guy just stumble his way through the crowd. No"excuse me"..no "coming through!"... it was almost like he couldn't wait to see where the fight was going to be that he started.

Now don't get me wrong. I am certainly not on a high horse. When I was in my 20's I was drunk PLENTY!!! And I'm sure I made a jackass out of myself PLENTY!!!! But here I am in my mid 30's. Wife, 2 kids, house, bills, cars, etc. ...and i just can't imagine going through life that way.

It's just that whole age thing that hits you every once in a while. But then I go home, see how everything has fallen into place, and then it's not about being old, it's just...........right.

C YA

TBONE!!

WOW!!!!!

America finally got it right!!!

At least Taylor has paid his dues in bars and honky tonks.

Congrats Taylor!!

SOUL PATROL!!!!

Back from the Islands

Alright, I came back. A week in OBX is just what the doctor ordered.

Some quick notes:

1)There were no fish to be found anywhere. I only mildly enjoy fishing, but if there is nothing to catch...I'm out!!

2)A 2 year old wants to fly a Mickey Mouse kite....until Mickey is in the air and about to go up 500 ft. then it's more like screaming and crying..."GET HIM DOWN GET HIM DOWN!!!!!!!"

3)I went get on a ferry one day and this employee asks what part of Jersey I was from he proceeds to tell me that he moved from the Cape May/Wildwood area......Just admit you're from the Villas!!!!!! It's O.K....you got out!!!

4)I got a free beer at Bubbas Bar b Que....probably because my father and I were pretty much the only people there(it is still the offseason there) and we ordered about $50 worth of fried chicken and pork spareribs. Good Food!!!

Anyway...it's good to be back. Can't wait for the Ultimate garage party.

Rock on!!!!!!!

Wish you were here

The Outer Banks of North Carolina.

Maybe I'll come back.

Rock on!!

How did my life wind up this way/????

The 16 year old girl and her mother next door made this and sent it over. For some reason I feel kind of dirty!!

But it's a damn good cake!!!!!!!!

I think I'll go to the bar....

AND HAVE A SMOKE!!!

OOOOOHHHHHH!!!!

Not anymore.

Don't get me wrong. I do sympathize with you smokers. I smoked for 12 years and then just up and quit 2 years ago. Not because of health reasons....not because of a growing family(alright....sort of)...but because it became two f***kin expensive. $5 a day...$10 on sat. and sun. became outrageous. So I quit. No patches...No pills...No acupuncture...etc...

I understand smoking and drinkin go together like motorcycles and bikinis......Dean and Martin......Jack and Coke....But don't stop going to your favorite bar just because you can't have a smoke. You're need to do it will pass. You can always go home and puff away all night long............FOR NOW!!!!!!!!!

HELP!!!

ALLERGRA!!!!

MY KINGDOM FOR A PERSCRIPTION OF ALLEGRA!!!!





They are saying(they, as in people who know these things), because we had such a warm wet winter allergy season is going to be killer. I am ready to go on record in saying that if the first week of Spring is any indication, I'm in big trouble this year.

Runny nose and non-stop sneezing is really slowing me down. As a matter of fact I'm beginning to rethink this whole moving out of EHT thing. Maybe they're on to something taking down all the trees. Maybe we should just take down all trees, bushese, plants, etc....blacktop everything, and then we will all breathe easier.

People who don't have allergy problems can't relate to how miserable it is. When I was a kid my allergies were so bad I was at the doctor 3 times a week getting all sorts of shots, inhalers, etc....IT WAS BRUTAL!!

The strange thing is, in my 20's at they heyday of my drinking and smoking, my allergies all but disappeared. Then two years ago I stopped the smoking altogether. People cheered"HOORAY!!"...but ever since then my allergies have returned. Maybe I should get a box of Marlboro Lights on the way home.....Scratch that it's almost $6 a box now.

If you have allergies good luck to you this spring. Go to the doc and get as much help as possible. If you don't have allergy problems......SCREW YOU!!!!

AND AS ALWAYS REMEMBER

THE BEATINGS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES.

PEACE!!!!

NOW THAT'S FUNNY

Saturday Night

I'm sitting here watching Iron Chef America and the secret ingredient this week is American Kobe Beef.

1) There has to be a million dollars worth of beef on this show/

2)They call me TBONE....why can't I be a judge on this show.

3)They're killing it with ....mushrooms,onions,...etc.

4)I'd be afraid of KOBE......you don't have a chance to say NO!!!!!

C YA!!!!!!

By the way....

CAPEMAYROX says....

THE BEATINGS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES!!

Apparantly it's a KMFDM song(they're a band)

I got it off a TSHIRT.

J.F.K. is one of the best movies ever.....it's also on right now.

BYE!!!

A THOUGHT

Remember......

Wherever you go....

that's where you are.

ON AN ISLAND...literally and figuratively...

It's pretty lonely when you're sick and you have to keep everyone away because you don't want it to spread through the household. The last thing you need is your 2 year old and 6 month old to get sick. That just leads to long nights and days.

So, I'm cooped up in this room but I need some music on or I'm going to go stir crazy. Friday afternoon TV is pretty desolate. Hey, look, it's the new David Gilmour record, "ON AN ISLAND". It's one of the perks of the business, I hear things before they're in stores (p.s....it's in stores on March 7th).

So a quick review.....

The album opens up with a nice instrumental a la the opening of the Momentary Lapse of Reason album. Dave still has that perfect sound to his guitar.

We segue into "On an Island" a song we've been playing for about a month now. Dave throws down a solo halfway through that stands up there with the Comfortably Numb solo. And yes, that's David Crosby and Grahm Nash singing background vocal.

Now onto "The Blue". Very mellow..but not in a bad way. It almost sounds like it could come off the "MEDDLE" album. So far, so good for this album.

OHHHHHH....I spoke to soon!!!

"Take a Breath" is Gilmour shot at a hard rock tune. Just doesn't work. Stick with what got you to the game Dave...keep us floating on a sea of clouds.

Next up is "RED SKY AT NIGHT". According to the credits that's David playing the saxophone here. Not bad. Insrumental. Sound like one of those black and white potboiler movies."the dame walked into my office and I knew her name must be trouble...."

"This Heaven".......far from it....acoustic shuffle....Yeah, no.

"Then I close my Eyes".....We start off with the ocean and a banjo. I like it so far...There we go know we're back in "floating on air" land. This one works.

"Smile"...Mellow acoustic...sounds like Dave is sitting on a front porch just him, a guitar, and a microphone......and then they overdubbed electric guitar, strings, etc. Still good.

"A Pocketful of Stones"...Sounds like an outtake from the Division Bell album. Kind of long...not good but not bad. Nice solo toward the end.

"Where we start"...another 6 min+ tune. "where we start/is where we end"...drop some acid and that's pretty deep. Not a terrible song to end the album. More of a climax would have worked for me.

So there you have it 7 out of 10. I guess that means thumbs up.

I'm going to go back to my "island" now. Theraflu and music what a way to spend a Friday.

Talk to ya soon!!

TBONE

E.O.F.(EQUAL OPPORTUNITY FUNNY)

I came across the first blonde MALE joke...I thought it was kind of funny.




An irishman,a mexican, and a blonde guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.

They were eating lunch and the irishman said,"Corned beef and cabbage!! If get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building."

The Mexican opened his lunchbox and exclaimed," Burritos again!! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off too."

The blonde opened his lunchand said," Bologna again!! If I get a bolgna sandwich one more time,I'm jumping too."

The next day the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.

The Mexican saw a burrito, he jumped too.

The Blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said" If I had known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again."

The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him tacos or enchillladas. I didn't realize he hated burritos so much!!"

(oh this is good!!!!)

Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said," Don't look at me. He makes his own lunch!!!!"

TH-TH-TH-TH-TH-THAT'S ALL FOLKS!!

Another Jaded View!!!!

Let's face it.. Sports is all about disaster. That's why we watch.. from the early days of WIDE WORLD OF SPORTS where the ski jumper never made it off the ramp...to Joe Theisman's leg snapping in half....to that russian female ice skater who got planted on her face...it's all about the disaster.

It doesn't even have to be a physical disaster. It could be a mental thing. Chris Webber calling a timeout without any to call(OHHHH....THERE GOES THE NATIONAL TITLE!!!).....the Chicago Cubs blowing it(ohhhhhh....there goes our trip to the World Series!!!!)....etc.

Writing this came to mind as I'm watching the Olympics here. Since I don't know anything about half of these "sports" I'm just looking for someone to make a big enough mistake that even the announcers go ......ohhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

Just like a car crash.....just like the words GUILTY AS CHARGED....we would rather see it go wrong than right. It makes for a better story.because the fish wasn't this big....it was THIS BIG!!!!!!

Peace.

and don't forget...

"THE BEATINGS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES!!!

It's all about class!!!!!

Alright, so I was rooting for the SEAHAWKS. I'm an NFC guy and, hey, There is only one working class team in PA. and it's not the STEELERS. Don't argue with me, christ, the Gov. of PA roots for the EAGLES so much so that he does the post game show on COMCAST SPORTSNET.

That being said I am currently disgusted with what happened at the end of the game. Where was Mike Holmgren for the handshake. He left Bill Cowher standing in the middle of the field looking like a jackass. Sure he normally looks like a jackass, but this was different. Seattle has to admit they were completely outplayed in the second half. Go shake the guy's hand and admit defeat.

What's worse is that the ABC cameras were all over this but no announcer said anything about it. Not Madden...Not Michaels....not Berman....not anybody!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am irate over this.maybe an answer is forthcoming but for now....MIKE HOLMGREN IS A D**K!!!!!And I was rooting for Seattle!!!!!!

Congrats PITTSBURGH....WELL PLAYED.

Rock On!!!!!

THIS JUST IN!!!!

NUMER 4 HAS BEEN CAPTURED AND DISPOSED OF.

"KILL 'EM ALL!!!"

I don't live in filth.

I've been in houses that would be considered "living in filth" and trust me, I'm nowhere near that. Then why, oh why, do I have a mouse problem in every house I move into????!!!!

My first house was a townhouse in EHT. Things were great in that place until I was watching TV one night and I heard some noise coming from the kitchen. Sure enough there's a mouse rummaging around. SON OF A BITCH!!! Look, I'll be the first to say that I don't like rodents, I don't want to touch rodents, stay away from me and I'll stay away from you.

So I now need to go into hunter mode and for two days I try to trap this mouse. Finally he gets caught in a glue trap. The kind that is more of a tent. He's stuck inside this thing with his head sticking out. All I know is that HE MUST DIE!!! I have one of those big tupperware tubs nearby. The kind you use for storage. It's full and heavy. So I take this thing lift it up above my head.......right before this thing lands on "Mickey" I hear a little squeal....too late....one less mouse. I thought that would be it but nope.....apparantly he had an accomplice. I never got hold of him. I sold the house two months later. I wonder if the new owner ever got that bastard.

So now I'm living in the new house and one night I'm watching TV and guess what I hear? Yep.....ANOTHER FU***NG MOUSE!!!!!!! I immediately got out to the store....glue traps, snap traps, d-con...I got it all!! It took two days but he wound up in a glue trap overnight and died a slow, painful death.. What a waste...If he had only stayed out.....

So flash forward to this past weekend... I find mouse poop in the silverware drawer. For thoses who don't know, mouse poop looks like chocalate"jimmies" you put on a cake. HERE WE GO AGAIN!! I clear out the drawer and put a glue trap in it with a dab of peanut butter in the middle (oh, it works). About 6 hours later there he is trapped and looking to die. That takes care of that. I put another trap there just in case......good thing I did.....three hours later we have another mouse!!!!! JESUS F'N CHRIST!!!!!! So I get rid of him and put another trap there and this morning I come downstairs and look in the drawer...guess what....YEP!!!!MOUSE NUMBER 3!!!!!!! What the hell is going on?????

Here's my theory......

Behind my house are some trees and bushes, on the other side of that brush is a toll booth, or was a toll booth it's been taken down. The highway(parkway) has also been broken up. In this moving of the Earth the mice were sent scurrying and wound up at my house.

Last I heard a fourth mouse had not been seen, trapped, witnessed, etc.

Good Thing!!

I SEND THIS OUT TO THE REST OF THE MOUSE COMMUNITY:


THE BEATINGS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES!!!!!!

GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!

I'm making money with this toll booth change!!!!

Alright, so I live in Seaville. Great town. Now, I work in West Atlantic City. It's a half hour drive to work. Obviously, I'm taking the Parkway. I leave my house, go up to Marmora(via rte. 9), get on the parkway there, go up to Exit 36 then take the Black Horse Pike to work. One toll, right at Somers Point. Used to be the same route home but now with the toll booth change things have changed.

If you live in a cave I'll fill you in. Depending on which toll booth you're at depends on whether you have to stop and pay as most toll booths on the Parkway are transitioning to one way tolls(70 cents at one time instead of 35 cents twice).

So anyway, going to work I now only pay 70 cents at the Somers Point area toll on the way home. I would always get off at the Marmora exit because I wasn't going to pay for the toll by Sea Isle. Now however Southbound at that Sea Isle toll is free. Now I can continue to zip down the Parkway get off at the Sea Isle exit and drive 2 miles to Seaville on Rte. 9 and I'm home.

How am I making money? Well, of course, it's figuratively. Because I'll never drive down to the Sea Isle on ramp to go TO work I'll never pay the Northbound 70 cent toll. But, I'll always pass through going south and it won't cost me!!!!

I LOVE BEING CHEAP!!!!!

ROCK ON!!!

and remember:

THE BEATINGS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES!!!

'NUFF SAID!!

The Velvet Revolver show SUCKED....and here's why!!!

Happy New Year everybody. I guess it's time I get back to updating this "blog" thing more often. And what a topic to start with.

Alright, so it's December 30th, my birthday begins at midnight, so I'm ready to get fired up at a quality rock show. I get to Borgata with some time to spare so I sit down at a slot machine. Literally 2 SPINS LATER I'm up 40 bucks. Sweet...my beers are now paid for. Cash Out!!!! The old guy next to me must have been pissed. Win and gone...that's how I roll!!!

So then I head up to the show. It's all been established ahead of time. NO OPENING ACT AND SHOWTIME IS 8 PM. Being that this is a concert it's a given that 8:15 or so is when the show will start. 8:15 comes and goes.....8:30 comes and goes.....8:45 comes and goes 9:00....9:10.....9:15.....9:20.....you've got to be f'n kidding me........9:30.....9:45 the lights go down. An hour and 45 minutes from the advertised showtime!!!!! I half expected AXL ROSE to show up.

So VR starts to play and it's just loud. Scott Weiland's voice is getting lost in the mix(not to mention he's dressed like the gay biker grom the village people), Slash just appears to be noodling away, overall a very shaky start.

Here's the real problem. Velvet Revolver was a great band on paper. Take one part S.T.P. and three parts GNR put them together and it's rock and roll heaven, right???WRONG!!! While "Fall to Pieces" and "Slither" are good songs the rest of the CONTRABAND album is filled with songs that may "rock" but are not catchy in any way. That does not translate well in a live setting. All you had to do was look around at the crowd. All the band was getting was the courtesy clap at the beginning and end of the song with blank stares in the middle. The only time the level got above tepid was when they broke out a GNR or STP song."It's So Easy""MR. Brownstone""Sex Type Thing" all got a bit of a frenzy going but then it's back to a CONTRABAND song and the energy would take a nosedive.

So, and hour and 15 minutes go by and guess what .....it's over!!!(not that I was all that upset). But I didn't pay for my ticket!!! At $100 a pop I would have wanted more....lots more!!!!

So overall on a scale of 1 to 10......it's only a 1...I really was that dissapointed.

Ohwell, here's to better concerts in 2006!!!

Rock On!!

and remember:

THE BEATINGS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES!!!!